Our school is doing the play "a Mid-summer's night dream" by Mr. William Shakespeare.
I'm a musical fairy, which means that I'll be a fairy playing the lullaby on my violin

BUT, I have to get a leotard, and tights [two pairs, one for rehearsal, one for the actual show night] and foot undeez. This is all going to cost about $30 which wouldn't be so bad IF I didn't have to pay $75 for the no-bake-bake-sale that my Chamb. Orchestra is holding so we can go play in Galveston. So I might have to choose between the play or orchestra. Now OF COURSE I would choose orchestra had it been under any other circumstances. I could just try out for the play next year, as orchestra is a full time thing since I play in my schools PERFORMING orchestra. BUT[oh there is always a but] I have been sick lately, and I missed too many days of school. I have to make up 2 days by either staying after school until I make up 8 hours, going to saturday school twice, or both. Since we have rehearsal for the play every week or more for 2 hours, I only have to go two more times [i've gone twice already] to have my days made up! but if I quit, I will no longer be able to attend these rehearsals, and therefore have to stay after longer to make up my days.
I guess I'm just being a lazyass though.
If I can't afford it, I'm going to have to quit the play.
:C
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Things have not been going so well with y father lately. Some of you may know that I don't have a very good relationship with my dad, some of you may not. Lately its gotten worse. I just don't want to spend time with him, and I have no idea why. I'm totally and completely serious when I say I have no clue as to why he repels me so much. I have told him that I don't want to rebuild my relationship right now, but he keeps emailing me and Molly [my un-welcomed step-mother] keeps texting me asking why when I've told her multiples times that I DO NOT KNOW.
He always has this way of making me feel guilty and responsible in his emails too saying things like
"...now I know how our heavenly father must feel when his children reject his love."
and
"... my actions are only reactions to your disrepect."
WHAT DISRESPECT? Just because I don't like him, thats disrespecting him?
This situation has been stressing me out for several years, and I think its gotten to the point that its making me physically sick, I have no other explanation of why I've been getting so sick. I'm starting to cry much more over the smallest of things.
I'm just so stressed.
I think I am going to go see a psychiatrist.

:C
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sorry to dump that on you guys, I've been carrying it around for so long....